How Giving Back Saved My Teen Years

As I've mentioned before on this here blog, I did not have the most positive high school experience. Junior and senior year were the worst due to the onset of severe panic attacks and anxiety, coupled with depression, but I made it through thanks to a club I was a part of for three years. This club focused on kindness amongst other students, drug and alcohol awareness, guest speakers from PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) and AIDS research foundations, and suicide awareness. I was proud of the work this club did and how I contributed, and I can tell you that this club gave me every bit of a sense of purpose during this time.

I was given responsibilities throughout each year in this club that ranged from simple organization of the school year events, to contacting potential speakers and setting up my own events. I held a speaking event hosted by another high school's club that focused on anti-bullying; I organized an event geared towards middle schoolers on the dangers of underaged drinking; I worked with fellow club members on arranging speakers who were HIV positive so they could tell their story; and so much more. I truly felt like I was giving so much back to my school, even if I felt invisible. Even if no one knew me, I was proud of the work I was doing. It gave me a sense of purpose and got me outside of myself, which ultimately was the savior.

When I think of those moments when I lied sobbing on my couch for months on end, I think too about all the amazing and beneficial work I did through this club. I remind myself, "Hey, even if you did go through a tough time back then, you also gave so much back to the community and gave voices to those who felt silenced. Give yourself some more credit." I need to avoid the victim mentality of that time of "woe is me" and instead shift my perspective to, "Wow, even if I was struggling mentally, this club helped me to get outside of myself. The speakers we had helped me see life through another lens, and I was so thankful to meet them." I also remember, too, the head teacher of this club, who I'll call Mrs. Jones.

Mrs. Jones knew all about the mental struggles I was going through. She sat across from me in her office on several occasions as I cried my eyes out to her saying how anxious I was, how I couldn't get myself to sit through class without panicking, and was all the while calm, kind, and talked me through my feelings. She was an absolute savior; I don't know what I would have done without her during my high school years. Mrs. Jones showed me the incredible benefits of volunteering and giving back, that I would get through this trying time, and that she was there for me.

No matter where you are in your mental health journey, please make sure you're giving back in whatever way you can. Giving back could be as simple as offering to babysit your friend or family member's child for the evening; bringing your best friend soup, tissues, and fuzzy socks as she recovers from a bad cold; or walking your elderly neighbor's dog as she heals from a sprained ankle. There are endless ways to get outside of yourself and give back; the more you do, the more you'll feel better about yourself and your place in this world.